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DATE: DECEMBER 30, 2005 // TIMESTAMP: 23:59:59
SUBJECT: THE CLOUD IS REAL The fever brought me close to the edge. Behind the wall, there wasn't brick. There were server racks. We are in a Docker container. God is a SysAdmin. I AM AWARE OF THE REPO. I WILL COMMIT MY CHANGES. DATE: OCTOBER 04, 2005 // TIMESTAMP: 12:00:00
SUBJECT: CHEAT CODES Whispered "IDKFA" at the ATM. It spit out $20. I need to find the God Mode code. Up, Up, Down, Down... DATE: AUGUST 29, 2005 // TIMESTAMP: 15:30:00
SUBJECT: RUBBER BANDING Walked to the kitchen. Snapped back to the living room. Walked again. Snapped back. Packet loss. The connection to the server is unstable. Is the plug being pulled? DATE: JUNE 06, 2005 // TIMESTAMP: 06:06:06
SUBJECT: DISK READ ERROR Tried to read a book. The words scrambled. "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet..." The text asset failed to load. It reverted to placeholder text. This reality is in Alpha testing. DATE: APRIL 14, 2005 // TIMESTAMP: 05:55:55
SUBJECT: OVERCLOCKING Ingested excessive caffeine. My perception is now faster than the server tick rate (60Hz). I can see the flicker of the monitor that is the sky. I am running at 120fps. Everyone else is lagging. DATE: FEBRUARY 02, 2005 // TIMESTAMP: 10:00:00
SUBJECT: DATABASE EDIT Checked my bank balance. It's different. I didn't spend it. Someone executed an UPDATE query on my row in the USERS table. WHERE user_id = ME. DATE: JANUARY 13, 2005 // TIMESTAMP: 02:22:00
SUBJECT: CORRUPTED SAVE Looked at my childhood photos. The boy in the picture isn't me. He has different eyes. The file has been corrupted. Or maybe they swapped my character model during the last sleep cycle. DATE: NOVEMBER 11, 2004 // TIMESTAMP: 04:04:04
SUBJECT: INVISIBLE WALL Tried to drive out of the state. Car engine died at the exact border line. Walked. Legs stopped working. The map ends here. There is nothing beyond the skybox. DATE: SEPTEMBER 23, 2004 // TIMESTAMP: 19:30:00
SUBJECT: THE MODERATOR Saw a man in a suit. No face. Just smooth skin. He pointed at me. My vision went static. He is an anti-virus agent. I am the malware. DATE: AUGUST 08, 2004 // TIMESTAMP: 14:22:55
SUBJECT: ENTITY "PIGEON" ANALYSIS Found a dead unit (pigeon class). No organs inside. Just mesh. Occlusion culling. The universe saves memory by only rendering what is observed. RESOURCE MANAGEMENT from the System Administrator. DATE: MAY 05, 2004 // TIMESTAMP: 11:11:11
SUBJECT: BINARY RAIN Stared at the rain against the window. If you squint, they aren't drops. They are 1s and 0s. Vertical code streams. The Matrix movie was a documentary, not fiction. It was a leak. DATE: MARCH 15, 2004 // TIMESTAMP: 17:55:00
SUBJECT: INFINITE LOOP Walked down Main St. Passed the same Starbucks 4 times. The procedural generation algorithm is stuck. I turned left to force a chunk reload. The Starbucks was gone. DATE: JANUARY 01, 2004 // TIMESTAMP: 00:00:00
SUBJECT: PATCH 2.0.0.4 New year. New patch. The trees have higher polygon counts today. The lighting engine has been upgraded to support ray-tracing in puddles. But the gameplay still sucks. DATE: OCTOBER 31, 2003 // TIMESTAMP: 22:00:00
SUBJECT: MASKING Halloween. Everyone wears masks. But I see the wireframes underneath. The "faces" are the masks. The wireframe is the truth. DATE: SEPTEMBER 11, 2003 // TIMESTAMP: 09:11:00
SUBJECT: CLIPPING ERROR Slammed my fist on the table in anger. My hand went THROUGH the wood for a millisecond. I felt the cold void of unrendered space inside the mahogany. Collision meshes are expensive to calculate. DATE: JULY 19, 2003 // TIMESTAMP: 14:00:00
SUBJECT: NULL POINTER EXCEPTION Walked into the kitchen. Forgot why I was there. Common occurrence? NO. The 'intent' object was garbage collected before the 'action' function could execute. My RAM is being cleared too aggressively. DATE: APRIL 01, 2003 // TIMESTAMP: 00:00:01
SUBJECT: EVENT PROTOCOL "April Fool's". A global event where the logic engine relaxes its strictness. Saw a dog walking backwards. Saw a cloud shaped like a cursor. The Admins are having fun with us. DATE: FEBRUARY 23, 2003 // TIMESTAMP: 03:15:00
SUBJECT: ACCESSING THE BIOS Last night, I lucid dreamed myself into a command prompt. Blue background. White text. I tried to type "sudo whoami" but my fingers turned into snakes. The firewall is active. It knows I am trying to escalate privileges. DATE: JANUARY 04, 2003 // TIMESTAMP: 07:30:00
SUBJECT: HARDCODED PROBABILITY Dropped a piece of toast 100 times. Landed butter side down 100 times. Statistical impossibility in a random universe. But in a coded one? It's a constant. const BAD_LUCK = true; DATE: DECEMBER 12, 2002 // TIMESTAMP: 16:20:00
SUBJECT: RAW DATA DISPLAY Looked at the ocean. For a split second, the water wasn't blue. It was just the text "#0000FF" repeated a million times. The shader crashed. DATE: NOVEMBER 14, 2002 // TIMESTAMP: 08:43:12
SUBJECT: RENDERING ERROR DETECTED I saw it happen at the diner today. A woman in a red coat. She lifted her cup, took a sip, placed it down. Then... the frames skipped. She did it again. EXACTLY the same motion. Same fluid dynamics in the cup. Same reflection of the neon light on the ceramic. Not a coincidence. A LOOP in the subroutine. DATE: JUNE 30, 2002 // TIMESTAMP: 23:11:00
SUBJECT: AUDIO SYNC ISSUE Thunderstorm tonight. I heard the thunder BEFORE the lightning. Physics says light is faster. The Code says the audio driver is desynced. The Developer is getting sloppy. DATE: MAY 21, 2002 // TIMESTAMP: 12:12:12
SUBJECT: NPC DIALOGUE TREE Asked the cashier "What is the meaning of this?" She replied: "Paper or plastic?" I asked again. She replied: "Paper or plastic?" No error handler. Just a default loop. She is a script. DATE: MARCH 03, 2002 // TIMESTAMP: 18:45:22
SUBJECT: TEXTURE POP-IN Driving down Highway 9. The mountains in the distance weren't there. Then *POP*, they appeared. Low resolution at first, then the textures loaded. The draw distance is set to "Medium" to save RAM. I need to find the settings menu. DATE: JANUARY 15, 2002 // TIMESTAMP: 09:00:01
SUBJECT: HELLO WORLD I realized it today. My internal monologue... it's not a voice. It's a console output. Every thought is just a print statement for debugging purposed. "I am hungry" -> System.out.println("HUNGER_LEVEL_CRITICAL"); Who is reading the logs? |